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hooks & shadows

I feel as if I'm trespassing in the world any time I set foot outside secret motel. But the clouds don't mind. I envy that kind of remote serenity. There's a trick, some important lesson, to leading a successful existence in this world. I'll be damned if I know what it is. I am missing something. I am fucking MISSING something!

We all get dragged into existence. And each of us has to decide for ourselves what it means to be alive, what it means to be human. By what standards can we say we are fulfilled? Consider all the people who have lived and died in this world. Each and every one of them should have been required to participate in an exit interview just before death. Each would be asked to rate their satisfaction with life. And then they would be asked to state what they thought was key to their satisfaction or what they thought was the root of their dissatisfaction. The results would be compiled and preserved for future generations to ponder and maybe construct an existential road map.

I can't wait till I'm tired enough to go to bed and fall asleep. Sunday night is always a culmination of a week's worth of bad thinking.

How do I unhook my mind? How do I relax the shadows?

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