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2018-01-15
let it all go


1. Just started reading Epictetus ("Discourses and Selected Writings"). A stranger on the train told me that it was one of his favorite books and that it had made a really strong impact on his life. The books I've been reading have definitely made me think about the way I think about things.

2. Someone tried to hijack one of my bank accounts, resulting in everything--checking, savings, credit card, debit card--being frozen. This has caused all sorts of trouble with my online payments, direct deposits of paychecks, etc. I am now entering the third week of this unresolved mess. I have spent three of my lunch hours, in the last two weeks, sitting in the bank and trying to get it all sorted out. I am being patient and refuse to panic, knowing this will all be fixed sooner or later.

3. IL is pregnant and coming to SF, this week, for a week-long visit. She was talking about making this a one-way trip, wanting to flee her boyfriend and give birth here in CA. A single mother-to-be with limited funds considers moving to the most expensive region in the country. Sure. Why not? But I think she is now reconsidering that move and just wants to come visit her old haunts and old friends. I kind of let go of all that "being in love" stuff. And I feel a lot better for it. Hopefully, she doesn't even remember me talking about it.

4. R. made a big mistake and is now experiencing extreme turbulence in her marriage. And guess what? She, too, wants to come to SF for a short visit. This coming weekend. What the fuck? She and IL don't know each other. But they know OF each other. I think she kind of wants to meet IL. I would LOVE to get a picture with both of them. That would make me incredibly euphoric. Other than that, these coming visits fill me with dread and anxiety if I think about them too much. So, I'm not thinking about them too much and just plan to play things by ear. It's just so weird that they are both in crisis-mode and decided to come at the same time.



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