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for quality assurance purposes only

Sometimes I get tricked into socializing. Like yesterday. I worked late to help out with an event in our office. There really wasn't much for me to do. It was more like babysitting. We made sure the people arriving for the event made it up to the right location. I spent the rest of the time drinking with a few co-workers outside on the deck. I kind of enjoyed it. The event ran late. So we went across the street for fish and chips. One of the waitresses in the restaurant was missing part of her arm, just below the elbow. She didn't seem to have any trouble functioning with one and half arms in a busy restaurant. I felt attracted to her. I wanted to kiss and caress the rounded nub of her stump, curl up with her somewhere quiet and maybe hear the story behind her amputation. I may be a vulgar man, but I'm not vulgar enough to come right out and ask people about their missing limbs. There's this one vendor who has been delivering coffee and kitchen supplies to our office for years. He's missing most of his fingers on one hand. And his thumb and thumb nail are disproportionately huge. I've been dying to ask him about what happened to his hand. I'm guessing he may have had some misadventures with fireworks when he was a kid. But, for all I know, that may be a sensitive subject. Jackasses probably ask him about it all the time. When I was seven, I broke my arm and had to wear it in a cast and sling. There was no shortage of strangers asking me how I broke it. I got so sick of these queries, I started making up stories. Just to keep myself amused. I learned at a very young age that people will believe the most absurd stories if told with a straight face and earnest tone.

Anyway, after the event was over and the office cleared, the facilities manager drove us all home. I'm the one who orders beer and wine for our office. We received a new shipment yesterday. And I put some samples in my bag to bring home and test for "quality assurance" purposes. So, I was being very careful not to let the others hear the bottles rattling in my bag. I try to be discreet about that sort of thing, even though I don't charge the company for my off-the-clock tests and evaluations.

Wow, it's just after 7 a.m.. This is a weird time for me to be posting. Sleep has been transient this week. But I have the day off. So I can go back to sleep soon and pass the rest of the morning behind shut lids.

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