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2006-07-19
eye lid cinema


Don't dig me out of weather. The white noise of overcast sky is a comfort.

The nurse is waving her arms in the distance. She has found a tree limb with a pulse. Her white uniform is a thrill in this grey landscape. But it's the first human movement I've seen in years, and it's a little disorienting--this human and this movement.

She crosses the field. She digs me out of weather. She searches my limbs for many moments and complains that she can't find my pulse. I keep it hidden, because I want her to continue touching me.

Pills prepare me for an opposing perspective of window panes. I adjust to white noise of the ventilation system.

I just want to empty my head on a cool floor. I tell this to the nurse over and over: I just want to empty my head on a cool floor. The orderlies lead me into a small room. The door is labled "LANDSCAPE." The nurse tells me to sleep away. The nurse and the orderlies leave the room. I listen to the ventilation system. I search my pillow case for sleep instructions. I roll off the cot and press my cheek to the floor. The tile is cool. I sleep away. I dream I'm on the moon. And the nurse is dressed in black. She is waving her arms in the distance. She has found my pulse. I leave my breath behind and join her to re-claim my pulse.



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